Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Randomize
