I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
You can't just leave with hair like that
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Randomize
