She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
