I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
