was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
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