But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
Floor bacon is actually really good
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Randomize