U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Randomize