So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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