Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
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