Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
