Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
