Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize