Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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