She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
