I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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