why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize