I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
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