Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
operation have a gay friend backfired
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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