i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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