So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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