I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
