tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize
