Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
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