ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
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