my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
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