Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
Randomize
