Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
Randomize
