the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
