She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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