thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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