My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
So much rum. So many feels.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Randomize
