Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I think your dad took our porno
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
i out mim tonsoeep
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