what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Tip for today: never try to fart and swallow at the same time. You'll end up choking on whatever you are currently swallowing and shit yourself from the freakout of choking.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
my shit smells like andre
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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