Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
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