I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
Randomize