I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Randomize