Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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