Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
