there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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