What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
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