fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
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