Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
