Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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