The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize
