He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Randomize
