just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
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