would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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