well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
Randomize
