I only kidnapped one of them. chill
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
How does one acquire holy water?
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
