we're blogging at a bar
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
