the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
do nipples grow back?
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
